Twisted Existence
by BackinBlack47
Summary: Story summary: Six people, all with dangerous habits. Their addictions are taking over their lives, and they're all in desperate need of help. Love, hate, pain, teenage angst, sex, drugs, alcohol, eating disorders, cutting, and more. It isn't like the TV
1. Chapter 1: Prologue

Story summary: Six people, all with dangerous habits. Their addictions are taking over their lives, and they're all in desperate need of help. Love, hate, pain, teenage angst, sex, drugs, alcohol, eating disorders, cutting, and more. It isn't like the TV show, just the same characters and location.

DISCLAIMER: I OWN NOTHING! NOT THE CHARACTERS, NOT THE TV SHOW. Just the plot of this story :p

**Warning: may be triggering! **

Twisted Existence

Everyone was hiding something.

Woody. He ate was to fill up the emptiness. Food was the only thing that had been with him through the worst pain and suffering. He had issues with it. He used it to fill up the emptiness inside. No one took the time to see past his outer shell, the food obsessed boy who wasn't the smartest person. He hid behind it. He binged on huge amounts of food, then threw it all up. He was bulimic, and threw up at least seven times a day.

Zack. He hid behind the player attitude. He was being used by every girl he ever dated. They wanted him for his body, or to make old boyfriends jealous, or that they got the player to say he loved them. Everyone thought he was fine with it, and didn't care. But it hurt him more and more every time he found out a girl had been using him. He had had his heart broken over and over and over. Every girl he loved just turned out to be using him. He drinks to dull the pain. Vodka, champagne, tequila, anything he can get his hands on.

Cody. He hid behind his genius. The truth was, he was lonely. He didn't have many friends, and most people he met were turned away by the fact that he was smart. Girls didn't want to date him, guys didn't want to be friends with him, and adults babied him. He went through life and acted like he didn't care. But he wanted people to see him for who he really was, and not just some nerd. It was 8th grade when he started cutting. He needed to feel something besides the loneliness. He stared wearing long pants, and long sleeves, since people started noticing the cuts, and how easily he got hurt.

London. She hid behind her dumb heiress personality. Her dad was never around, and he went through step mother after stepmother. Anyone of them that she had gotten close to, her dad had dumped. And when she tried to keep talking to them, they just wanted to use her to get closer to her rich daddy. It was the same with everyone. Rich people, poor people, whoever she met. Her dad didn't even care what happened to her. But the little rich girl has a secret. She's anorexic, and a binge eater. She starves herself for days, and then eats everything in sight. Then the cycle repeats itself, over and over, and over.

Addison. She's always hyper, and no one knows why. She went through a stint in rehab for an addiction to prescription painkillers after she broke her leg and was prescribed them. She'd been on heroin, crack, and meth. Drugs were hard to get since she was on a cruise ship, so she stole pain killers and anything she could get from the infirmary. She's addicted, and pops pills like mints. She can get away from all of her emotions, of pain, of total feeling, and no one was the wiser.

Bailey. She wasn't as innocent as she seemed. In Kettlecorn, she was still known as a nerd. She was teased in school, bullied, and she turned to boys to make herself feed better. The guys she slept with never wanted relationships, they just wanted to have sex with her. The sex made her forget the pain, and feel wanted. When the ship stopped at different ports, she would disappear for hours. She had slept with a bunch of different guys, and didn't even know half of their names. Not for money, but for the feeling of being wanted by someone. It was a life full of one night stands.

Six people, all dangerously close to the edge. How long before they fall?


	2. Chapter 2: Our Story Begins

Chapter 1: Our Story Begins

Seven Seas High. From the outside, it seems so innocent. But from the inside, it was so far away from that. It was a normal day. The students were sitting in the classroom, listening to Mrs. Tuttweiler lecture them about the French Revolution. Everyone was in their usual seats. Bailey sat in the front, near the middle. Addison sat near the window. London sat near the door. Woody sat in in a middle row. Cody and Zack sat on opposite sides in the back of the room. It was a Friday afternoon, and everyone in the class, including the six friends, were going to a party that night. It was in Stephanie Wright's and Ursula Newton's cabins. By a fluke, some of the cabins had been built bigger than others when the ship was remodeled. Stephanie's and Ursula's were a few times bigger than the other cabins, and were connected. London was very jealous. It was going to be a usual high school party. Sex, drugs, booze, and far enough away from the teachers cabins that they wouldn't hear a thing. It was a big ship.

Cody sighed. He uncurled a paperclip, pulled his sleeve up, and ran it along his arm. Not too deep; he didn't want to bleed too badly in class.

Addison pulled a tin that used to be full of mints, but now little white pills, out of her bag. She popped a couple into her mouth. She had taken them from the infirmary, and didn't even know what the hell they were. She just needed the high.

Woody was currently eating a cinnamon roll, one of many he had stashed in his backpack. He didn't plan on purging until after school, after he had eaten at the buffet.

London was texting as usual. She heard her stomach growl, and sunk lower in her seat. She couldn't remember the last time she had eaten.

Zack pulled out his water bottle, which he had filled with vodka. He took a long swig. He couldn't face the rest of the day until the party without being at least a little tipsy.

Bailey was daydreaming about Scott Harold, and a couple other boys she had slept with this week. She couldn't wait until the party tonight. There would be tons of horny guys. Maybe she could even have a threesome.

**Yeah sorry this chapter was really short. The next chapter will be longer and have more action. Just wanted to get the introductory thing over. **


	3. Chapter 3: Party Blues

Chapter 3: Party Blues

Zack could hear the thumping base all the way down the hall. He grinned. It was going to be one hell of a party. He stopped in front of Sophie's door, and turned the knob. The door swung open, and he was greeted with the chaos that was a high school party. It was an atmosphere of sexual tension. Couples were making out everywhere. Red plastic cups were scattered around the room, and every surface was sticky with beer.

Zack grinned. He walked in and slammed the door. He spotted the nearest keg and walked over. Bailey was making out with someone next to it... what was his name again? David.. .no Daniel... no Devon! that was it. He grabbed a cup and filled it to the brim with beer. He winked at Bailey who was peering at him over... whatever his name was... shoulder. She blew a kiss at him. He laughed, and took a swig of his beer.

XXX

Cody had come to the party a while before Zack had. He was wearing his usual jeans and a long sleeved shirt to hide his cuts. He was lounging on one of the couches, smoking a joint. Addison plopped down beside him. "Hey Cody," she said. She held out her hand, which had two pills in it. "You want?"

Cody grinned. Ecstasy. Party drugs were a must. He grabbed a pill out of her hand, popped it in his mouth, and swallowed it dry. She grinned at him, and swallowed the other one. He held out his joint. "You want a hit?"

"Hell yes." She grabbed it out of his hand and took a huge puff. She handed it back to him as she blew smoke out of her mouth. Cody took a huff. He smiled, leaned his head back, and blew out smoke. He rested there for a minute, before dropping the joint in an ashtray on the nearby table. He stood up, and offered his hand out to Addison.

"You wanna dance?" he asked. She grabbed his hand and stood up.

"Fuck yes." They made their way to the center of the room. They were grinding against each other within seconds.

XXXX

Bailey pulled away from her kiss with Devon. She whispered in his ear, "You wanna take this to the bedroom?"

"Fuck yes!" She smiled and pulled him away.

Bailey entered her room, lips firmly attached to Devon's. She kicked the door close behind them. She pushed him onto the bed, and yanked his shirt off. She smashed her mouth back on his, and climbed on top of him. He pulled a way for a moment, only to rid her of her shirt and her bra. She smiled and reached for his pants.

Cody and Addison had relocated themselves back to the couch, and were kissing heavily. He sucked on her lip, and she moaned into his mouth. She moved so she was straddling him. "Get a room!" someone yelled at them over the music. Cody pulled away from the kiss and smirked.

"Actually, that's not such a bad idea," he commented.

She licked her lips. "Exactly what I was thinking." She stood up. Cody stood and grabbed her hand. She looked at him. "Mine or yours?"

"Yours," Cody said. "I gotta roommate."

She smiled. "Say no more."

XXXXX

Zack had no idea what the fuck was going on. His vision was starting to blur, and he could barely walk in a straight line. He'd had a few tequila shots, some beer, and a bit of vodka. His alcohol tolerance was higher than most, because of his obsessive drinking. He could hear people shouting. A fight had probably broken out. He was pushed backwards by a crowd of people, and fell over the couch. He climbed up unsteadily. _I need some more beer_, he thought.

XXXXXXXX

London wasn't in the room she shared with Bailey. Nor was she at the party. She was in the boiler room, away from everyone. She was stuffing her face with every type of junk food imaginable. She hadn't eaten in... well she couldn't remember how long. She didn't know why she put herself through this. She wouldn't eat for days. Then she would pig out on everything imaginable. Then she would feel guilty, and exercise like crazy to try and burn it off. They the cycle would start all over again. She kept telling herself that she would stop. But she couldn't.

She grabbed another chocolate bar, and unwrapped it. She shoved it into her mouth, and washed it down with a swig of soda. It was going to be a long night.

XXXXXX

Woody bent over a trash can in the bathroom. He stuck his fingers down his throat, and watched the vomit come up. When he was done, he slid down to the floor, leaning against the wall. He buried his face in his hands. He was shaking. He kept promising himself that he would stop this. But every time he tried, he could never stop himself from making himself throw up, whether it was his fingers down his throat, or stolen ipecac. He was throwing up more and more lately. He was spiraling out of control.

XXXXXX

**A/N: Phew. That was interesting. I don't really know where I'm headed with this story so... anyone wanna give me some ideas? I was just going to go through what they go through on a daily basis, and the problems they have. I have more chapters written, but I have no idea where they're going to fit into the story. :s Anyone want to give me some ideas? Any input would be greatly appreciated. This is one of the first long stories I've written. **


	4. Chapter 4: The Morning After

Chapter 4: The Morning After

**A/N: I haven't decided what the final couples in the story would be, but thanks for the help everyone who reviewed. Helped me put how the problems are going to be revealed... kind of. But thanks to everyone for their input! 2**

**Here's a chapter for you Cailey lovers. Doesn't quite start out that way, but it's in there. Sorry it's not that much emotional stuff. **

**I don't know if they'll stay a couple or what, but for now... they like each other. Some people want Zack and London, and Woody and Addison. Personally, I still like Addison and Cody, Zack and Bailey, and Woody and London. Or Zack and London and Woody and Bailey. I'm not sure what to do. I'm personally not a huge Cailey fan, but I guess they're fine. **

**For some reason, I find it hard to write Woodison... idk why... Just can't picture them really together. **

**I'm still unsure... I just love CodyXAddison...hmmm**

Cody woke up feeling hungover as hell. He sat up and looked around. He was in an unfamiliar room. They he remembered. And smiled. He and Addison had gotten very... busy last night.

There was a note, a bottle of aspirin, and a glass of water on the table next to the bed. He popped 2 pills, drained the glass, and started to read the note.

_Cody-_

_Thanks for the amazing time last night. Had to go early, get some stuff done. Bailey's looking for you by the way. She says to meet her in the game room. Looks like she's lusting after you too ;). Condoms in the top drawer. Have fun. _

_-Addison _

Cody smiled. This again. He and Addison were friends with benefits. They got drunk, had sex, and went back to being normal friends again. It didn't upset him. She was great in bed.

He heaved himself out of the bed and stretched. He glanced at the clock. It read 12:05 pm. _Damn,_ he thought. _How long have I been out?_ He grabbed his shirt and pants off the floor, and put them on. Addison either didn't care about his cuts, or had been to high or hungover to notice. He stuffed his feet in his shoes, and lumbered out the door.

XXXXX

Bailey walked up to the smoothie bar. She ordered a blueberry banana blitz, and plopped down in a chair to wait.

Last night, after Devon, she had slept with Sam, and then Toby. Luckily, she'd gone to their rooms, and when she'd slunk back in hers around 2 in the morning, London was already in bed asleep. It was already past noon and she was still there. Bailey was too lazy to wake her up. But she wasn't too lazy to wake up at 8 am and take her "morning after" pill. She had gone to Addison's room to see if she could borrow some condoms. Addison always had an emergency supply. She knocked on her door, and opened it when there was no answer, only to find Addison asleep in bed with Cody. She had smiled. She woke Addison up, but didn't even try with cody. He was a very deep sleeper. He had the covers pulled up to his chin, and was curled into a ball. He had looked so innocent. She'd told Addison that she had wanted to talk to Cody anyways, so Addison had written the note. Addison went for a swim, and Bailey just went to read on the deck.

"One blueberry banana blitz!" the barista called out. He slid it across the counter towards her.

She took it and headed off towards the game room, hoping that Cody was finally up. She opened the door. A pair of lips smashed into hers. She was surprised, but smiled when she realized she was staring into the blue-green eyes that belonged to none other than Cody Martin.

He pushed her up against the door, kissing her hungrily. She dropped her smoothie on the ground, and wrapped her arms around him. She pushed against him as their tongues fought for dominance. It was going to be a fun day.

XXXXX

Zack groaned and sat up. Where the fuck was he? He looked around, and realized he was on his bathroom floor. He vaguely remembered coming back to his room last night, smoking some weed, downing more tequila, and then puking his guts out. Suddenly, he felt a wave of nausea. He leaned over the toilet and vomited. He groaned and slunk back against the wall. It was going to be a long day.

XXXXX

London sighed, and shut off her ipod. She was tired. After her binge last night, she'd exercised until one thirty in the morning, when she'd gone back to her room and immediately fell asleep. She'd woken up at one in the afternoon, only to get dressed and go lounge on the Sky Deck.

She stood up from the chair she was lounging in. She'd go work out to stop herself from drinking a smoothie which she so craved.

She was so absorbed in her own thoughts, that she didn't notice Zack walking down the hallway until she ran into him.

He groaned and put his hands up to his head. "Sorry Zack!" she said. "I didn't run into you that hard did I?"

"Nah, I just got a little too drunk last night. Fucking hangover. I've been puking all morning." Zack said. "How come you weren't at the party? No drinking?"

"No way! Do you know how many calories are in alcohol?" she said. He frowned.

"You don't need to count calories. You're already sexy the way you are," he said.

London stared at him. "Do you mean that?"

He shrugged. "Yeah. I've always thought so."

She smiled. "Thanks Zack."

"Welcome. Wanna join me for a nap on the deck?"

"No, I have to go. Later Zack!" she waved at him as she walked off down the hall. No one had ever told her that before.

XXX

Woody sat down with two plates loaded from the buffet. He had come here the moment he had woken up, since no one had seemed to notice that he hadn't been at the party. He had chicken, rice, broccoli with cheese sauce, mashed potatoes, jello, chocolate mousse, and pasta. These were just his first of many trips to be made up to get more food.

After a few more plates, Woody started to feel sick. He stood up and hurried to the bathroom. He felt the food coming back up, so he rushed to a stall and locked the door. He leaned over the toilet, and violently emptied the contents of his stomach into the white porcelain bowl. He flushed the toilet, and pushed his fingers down his throat to vomit again.

Then he heard footsteps. He sat up straight. He heard whoever it was bolt out of the restroom. He leaned back on his heels and sighed. He had been in so much of a hurry that he forgot to check to see if the bathroom was empty.

_Fuck_, he thought. He hoped that they wouldn't come back and check who it was.

XXX

Addison stumbled back into her room. That morning, she had woken up to find that she was half naked, using Cody as a pillow. While she was getting dressed, Bailey had walked in to come to find Cody and borrow condoms. Addison had just left him a note telling him to meet Bailey later. Afterwards, she had gone to the infirmary to steal some more painkillers. Then she had gone for a walk around the ship.

She collapsed on her bed, and passed out.

**A/N: so yeah that was pretty short sorry. Not too eventful, just wanted to get more POV's up. I actually have quite a few chapters written for this, I just have no idea where to put them in the story...**


	5. Chapter 5: Life Ain't a Bowl of Cherries

Chapter 6: Life Ain't a Bowl of Cherries

**A/N: Still the same day lol. Idk why I'm dragging it out so long. It's NOT a pointless chapter though, so enjoy. Has more of people's feelings than previous chapters. **

Cody stumbled back into his room. After the game room, he and Bailey had gone back to her room, and... gotten busy. Well, they had started too, when Bailey pulled away all of a sudden said, "I can't do this anymore. Not with you," and ran out of the room leaving him lying on the bed with his pants unzipped.

He sat down on his bed. He had no idea why she'd run away. He sighed. He didn't really like her in that way. Sure, they were friends. He hadn't really wanted to have sex with _her_; he just wanted sex. Sure, he would have preferred it from someone else. Addison. He sighed. He hated to admit it, but he liked her as more than a friend. They had a "friends with benefits" system set up. Sex, no strings attached. It usually started at the weekly parties that were thrown every night. He was surprised that only Bailey had caught on. He hadn't expected to actually start to like her more than a friend. It was worrying. He didn't want to become this way. Her, Bailey, more. He had had sex with many girls, without one ounce of feeling into it. He didn't know how he'd become this way. He stood up from his bed.

He robotically went to his bathroom and opened the medicine cabinet. He grabbed a razor blade from his stash, and pulled up his sleeve. The only thought running through his head was that he needed to see his blood. Now. He ran the razor across his forearm, first quickly, then slower, savoring the pain and watching the drip of blood pave its way down the pale skin of his arm.

XXXX

Bailey ran into the public bathroom on the deck, and locked herself in a stall. She sat down on the floor, leaning against the stall door. She had been all set to fuck Cody this morning, but when they went back to her room, she had started having second thoughts. He had pulled her onto her bed. She hesitantly started to unzip his pants, but couldn't do anymore. This was one of her friends, not some random boy that she didn't care about. She didn't like him as more than a friend, and having sex with him would probably ruin that. Plus, she could see that Addison liked him. Even though she didn't say it, Bailey could tell. She knew about their "friends with benefits relationship". It had been going on for years. She didn't want to come between anything that could happen between them.

_Like I haven't ruined enough relationships already,_ she thought sadly. It was true; she'd broken up plenty of couples because she'd slept with someone's boyfriend. It had happened too many times to count. She had heard the same story countless times. The girl wouldn't put out, or they wanted to fuck someone different. She easily fulfilled their needs. They wanted her, but wouldn't keep her. Plenty of girls hated her. She knew she should stop. She'd already had a few pregnancy scares. But she needed to feel wanted, even if it was just for a little while.

XXXX

Addison woke up sprawled across her bed. She sighed. She'd taken way too many pills again. She'd been doing that more and more lately. She usually took more of... whatever it was she had when she felt out of control. She had just started blacking out in the past month though. She wasn't sure if it was an accident, or she was subconsciously trying to kill herself. She sighed and slowly pushed herself up. She learned from experience that if she sat up to fast after she blacked out, it would just make her nauseous. She needed to stop. She knew the pills were going to kill her sooner or later, but she didn't want to stop. She didn't want to face a day without them.

XXXX

London was in the weight room, on the elliptical machine. She looked at her calories burned. 500. _Finally,_ she thought. She hopped off, and reached for her bottle of water. She knew she had to eat. The cycle of not eating, then eating everything was getting to her. She couldn't take it for much longer. But the words Zack had said to her earlier kept running through her head. "You're already sexy the way you are..." It gave her chills. No one had every said those words to her and actually meant it. She hoped he wasn't another one of those people, and that he actually meant it. She did like him as more than a friend. Suddenly, she felt faint. She gripped the side of a treadmill, and tried to steady herself. It was the not eating. She'd been getting weaker and weaker lately. She'd almost collapsed the other day. Though it still wasn't enough to make her eat. Maybe then someone would like her for her. They'd hold her and never let her go.

XXXX

Woody was curled up in a ball on his bed. He was waiting for Cody to come out of the bathroom so he could be alone in their room, without the fear of anyone coming in to disturb him. _Jesus,_ he thought. _He's been in there for over an hour._ _How long does it take?_ He wanted to be alone, but he didn't want to get up and move. Where would he go? It was a cruise ship. No place was private. The fact that he knew someone had heard him purging made him feel... vulnerable. Bulimia was his secret. He didn't want anyone to be in that part of his life. He knew that the disorder was eating him alive, but he didn't want to be forced to stop. He knew it was dangerous, but he was unable to control it.

XXXX

Zack stripped down to his boxers, turned out the light, and crawled into bed. He didn't mean to tell London that he thought she was hot; it just slipped out without him thinking. Sure, it was true. He just was afraid of her rejecting him. Luckily, she didn't seem that upset. He had invited her to take a nap with him on the deck. He mentally slapped himself. _Offering to sleep with a girl the second after you tell her she's hot. Good job shithead,_ he thought. She seemed to know he hadn't meant it like that, thankfully. He pulled the covers up to his chin, and turned on his side. Afterwards, he had slept on the deck, and grabbed a smoothie. That was a mistake. He felt sick the second he started drinking, and had run into the bathroom to puke again. It was strange. He had heard someone else in there, throwing up too. He had hurriedly rushed out, to avoid meeting whoever was in there. Hangovers were the worst.

He sighed. Parties happened every Friday on the ship. Every week, he promised himself that he wouldn't get completely wasted. Every week he broke his promise, and ended up hungover as hell the next day, not remembering much of what had happened. He couldn't wait for next week's party though...

**A/N: There we go. Interesting? Yes, No? Trying to get the next few chapters plotted out, since 3 happened in the same day :s. Yeah, not sure how that came up. This one had more of the... inner thoughts shall we say? of everyone. Should I make a few more chapters before their problems start to be discovered? I have one plotted out, but I don't know if there should be more. I feel like there should be a few. So sorry about the long updates. I have health and art class in the summer and a shit load of summer hw. So... I'll update when I can you guys! At least once a month. **


	6. Chapter 6: A Wonderful Emptiness

**A/N: Sorry for the long wait! Apologies from the bottom of my heart. I had a bit of a writers block and didn't know what to do... well, maybe more than a small block. It's been two years. A Very Large Block. I just need to get through this spot. Let's just say I had things planned, but I didn't know how to get there. Hopefully I will be more... timely... with my updates. But... I will see this story to the end, because I do quite like it. **

London woke up on Monday to a cow mooing. At first she was confused, but then she realized it was Bailey's damn alarm. She groaned and put a pillow over her head, successfully blocking out the light streaming in through the window. She had been up late last night exercising and was still dead tired. She heard a thump as Bailey reached over and turned it off. She had just started to drift back to sleep when a phone started vibrating from the desk in the corner of the room.

London pulled the pillow off her head and started to get up to check if it was hers, but Bailey beat her there. "Don't get up. It's mine," Bailey called over her shoulder.

London got back under the covers. She watched as Bailey popped a pill into her mouth. "What's that?" London asked as Bailey swallowed.

"Aspirin," Bailey snapped. London raised an eyebrow. London wasn't an idiot. She had an idea of where Bailey disappeared to most weekend nights... and some weekdays too. She knew that it was probably birth control, but she didn't want to make Bailey feel uncomfortable so she never asked about it. It was easier to let people think that she didn't notice things.

"Bad night?" London asked, putting her arm over her eyes, hoping Bailey's answer could be quick so she could go back to sleep.

"You have no idea," Bailey replied, massaging her temples. She heard London make a noncommittal sound as she plopped down in her desk chair, wincing as her shoulder hit the firm fabric. The guy she was with last night, David, had been a little rough. She went to bed with a dark purple hickey on her chest (which luckily was covered by her shirt), and a wicked bruise on her shoulder from slamming against a wall too many times.

She unlocked her phone to check her messages. It was from Addison. _Just found out we're docking tonight. Wanna go bar hopping?_

Bailey quickly sent a text back._ Sure. Don't forget your fake ID this time :p _

Bailey waited until she heard London's breathing slow to get up from the chair and quietly get dressed. London was always late to class. Bailey never bothered waking her up on time anymore; she usually just went back to sleep. Bailey slipped on her shoes, grabbed her phone and her key card, and quietly slipped out of her and London's room, heading out to get breakfast.

XXXX

With the absence of an alarm, London slept for another forty five minutes. When she opened her eyes, the clock read 8:55 in bright red numbers. Class started in five minutes. She sighed. Timeliness had never been her forte, but it had gotten worse lately. Lack of food coupled with excessive workouts caused her to feel extremely fatigued. Throwing her covers to the side, she slowly sat up and put her feet on the floor. Making sure she wasn't feeling dizzy, she stood up. She'd done it too fast. Her vision blurred for a few seconds before clearing, something else that could be contributed to a lack of food. She eased herself onto the floor. 100 crunches and 30 push up later, she stood back up, steadying herself against her nightstand.

Since she was already late, she took her time showering and getting dressed. Her perpetual lateness was a good excuse to miss daily breakfast with her friends. She knew they would question her if she didn't eat anything with them. They would just assume she ate somewhere else. Her lateness caused another problem with school though. But as long as she got to school before lunch, she wouldn't get in too much trouble. Miss Tutweiller was used to her being late. As long as someone caught her up on what she missed and she got a least a C or D, she would pass the class.

The last thing she did was put on her makeup; enough to hide how pale her face had been getting, and the dark circles under her eyes.

On the way out of her and Bailey's room, London paused to look at her reflection in the full length mirror next to the door. The second she caught sight of her full body in the mirror, she knew it had been a mistake.

She stared at her body. Her clothes hung loosely on her frame. Her skirt highlighted her bony knees. She lifted up her shirt, and stared at her torso. She could count each of her ribs, which stuck out move over her concave stomach. She ran her fingers over her ribs, feeling the dips between each bone. Her body disgusted her, but she couldn't stop looking at it. It was a sort of grim fascination with her misery.

She gradually lost sight of her body as she walked closer to the mirror. She stopped when she was a step away from going cross eyed. She lifted her hands to either side of her face, and splayed them flat against the mirror. She stared for a few seconds without blinking. She was mesmerized by her eyes in the mirror. The only part of her body that hadn't changed at all from her weight loss.

"Why am I so fat?" she whispered to her reflection. She paused for a moment, the silence of the room sinking in. "WHY AM I SO FUCKING FAT?" she screamed, forming her left hand into a fist and pounding the glass.

She snapped out of her delirium when she felt a few tears roll down her face. She quickly stepped away from the mirror, moving her arms down to her sides. She fought against the sudden urge to smash the mirror. She took a deep breath, settling her thoughts. She couldn't do anything rash.

London sniffed and dabbed at the wetness on her face with the back of her hand, taking care not to smudge her makeup. She couldn't break down now. She had to stay strong. She wouldn't eat breakfast today. Or lunch. Dinner with her friends would be hard to get out of, but she had to keep this wonderful emptiness for as long as possible.

XXXX

"Your table manners are disgusting, Woody." Cody flinched as barbecue sauce splattered on his shirt from Woody's turkey leg. Somehow Woody managed not only to get food all over himself, but on those around him as well. Cody was sitting next to Woody at the table on the Skydeck. Addison was on Cody's right, with Zack across from Cody. Bailey was sitting to the right of Woody, with a chair putting space between them. London was no where to be found. She rarely joined them for breakfast anymore.

Woody shrugged. "Not my fault," he said around a mouth full of turkey. "Barbecue sauce is naturally messy." He was working on his second turkey leg. The bone from the first sat on a plate in front of him, covered in barbecue sauce.

"Woody, why are you eating turkey legs for breakfast?" Addison asked him.

Woody shrugged. "It's always time for turkey legs."

"But they're not really breakfast food," Bailey said.

"Don't care," Woody said, his mouth again full of turkey.

"Hey. The Woodster here can eat whatever he wants for breakfast. Who gets to say what food is for breakfast or not? We should get to decide what we want to eat and when we want to eat it! Power to the People!" Zack said, waving his fist in the air. He had taken a few shots of strong liquor before coming to breakfast this morning, and he was starting to feel the effects.

"I suppose you're right," Bailey said, a smile playing on the edge of her lips. Addison just raised an eyebrow. Cody covered his face with his hand. Woody took another bite of his turkey leg.

XXXX

When everyone was finished eating, they stood up to head to class.

"I'll catch up with you guys later," Woody said. "I gotta go take a leak." In reality, he was going to go puke. He didn't want to let the food settle in his stomach. The thought of the turkey seeping into his bloodstream disgusted him. It would weigh him down, make his body even heavier than it already was. He could not let that happen.

"Yeah, I gotta go too," Zack said. He started towards the bathroom. Woody's eyes widened. He wasn't prepared for that. The thought of one of his friends hearing him throw up terrified him. Unfortunately, he didn't have time to go back to his room, or to a bathroom on another deck.

"A-actually, I don't have to go anymore." Woody nervously shuffled his feet.

"Suit yourself," Zack said, continuing to the bathroom.

Cody rolled his eyes. "Thanks for sharing Woody. We really needed to know the status of your bladder."

"You're welcome!" Cody's sarcasm sometimes affected Woody more than he let on. He just went along with it. People already thought he was a little slow. He didn't need the extra stress of trying to prove them wrong. He started towards class, following Bailey and Addison, with Cody trailing behind him.

XXXX

Woody could feel the turkey sitting in his stomach. He hated when he couldn't get rid of what he ate, especially when it was that much. All he could focus on was the full feeling in his stomach. He was so used to throwing up that this feeling of... digesting food was new to him. He nervously tapped his fingers on the table. He needed to puke. Right now. He glanced at the clock. He had only been in class for ten minutes.

"Miss Tutweiller can I go to the bathroom?!" he blurted out. The class turned to look at him. He could feel his face heat up under their stares.

Miss Tutweiller crossed her arms. "Yes Woody, you may. But next time, please go before class."

"Thanks!" he said a little too loudly. He stood up from his desk and walked hurriedly out of his room. He hurried out of the room and out to the bathrooms on the deck. Luckily, no one was in there. He locked the bathroom door just to be safe, then proceeded to lock himself in a stall as well. He put a few pieces of toilet paper in the toilet, to prevent the splash from vomit hitting the toilet water from hitting his face. He leaned over, and stuck a finger down his throat.

When he was finished, he wiped the outside of his mouth with toilet paper, tossed it in the bowl, and flushed the toilet. He unlocked the stall door, stepping out into the main part of the bathroom, tears stinging his eyes. He wiped his eyes with the corner of his shirt. He walked over to the sink, turned on the faucet, and stuck his mouth under the running stream of water. He rinsed his mouth a few times, then straightened up.

He stared at himself in the mirror above the sinks. He really look at himself. Eyes slightly red from throwing up, teeth wearing down from so much vomiting. But inside, he felt... empty. Wonderfully empty. He sighed a sigh of relief. He splashed cold water on his face and dried it off with a paper towel before unlocking the bathroom door and heading back to class.

**A/N: I would just like to say that I really am sorry for being gone so long. I have no good excuse. But here I am again :). My writing style may have changed a little bit; just me getting older I suppose. Hope you guys liked this chapter. **


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